We Need to Talk
Help Beyond the Conversation
Additional Information
Most older drivers will agree to limit or stop driving after patient, caring conversations with family members. If the driver refuses to comply, you may need to enlist the support of a doctor or driver rehabilitation specialist for a formal driver assessment.
If you feel that safety is seriously compromised, you may have to take unilateral action, such as contacting the motor vehicle licensing authority.
If the older driver has dementia, families should be vigilant about observing driving. Anyone with a diagnosis of Alzheimer's disease, or any other form of progressive dementia, will eventually lose the skills necessary for safe driving.
Comprehensive Driving Evaluations
Professionals can assess driving skills and identify ways to continue driving safely.
More on Comprehensive Driving Evaluations
Dementia and Driving
Some persons in early stages of dementia may have sufficient insight into their driving abilities to make adjustments. They should be given the opportunity to make decisions about driving if safety is not compromised. Over time, these individuals will become incapable of accurately assessing their driving skills. In progressive dementia, the disease will eventually rob the driver of skills necessary for safe driving. In these cases, families and doctors must collaborate to protect the individual and may need to take immediate unilateral action.
Families of persons with dementia may not realize that getting lost in familiar places is a serious warning sign. Persons who are confused and forgetful may also lack the ability to respond appropriately to ever-changing road conditions. Families should be vigilant about observing driving behavior. Firsthand knowledge of driving behavior will help families know if and when they need to intervene.
If a High Risk Driver Refuses to Stop and You’ve Tried Everything Else
In very rare and extreme situations when you've tried having ongoing family conversations, arranging for alternative transportation, and working with the driver's physician, and these methods have not been successful in convincing an unsafe driver to stop driving, you may need to take extreme measures. Although these types of measures, like taking away access to the car, may seem severe, they may be a family's only option, particularly if the high risk driver has dementia.
These types of options, like taking away access to the car keys, should only be a last resort, when all other options have failed. Most families will not need to take these extreme measures. For those that do, keep in mind, however, that some drivers may find ways to work around these actions and may continue to find ways to drive. If you have not yet done so, speak with the high-risk older driver's physician or schedule a comprehensive driving evaluation to decide what is the best course of action to take.
To read more about
- Crafting Caring Family Conversations With Older Drivers
- Preparing for the Conversation.
- Having the Conversation About Driving.
- For more information about family conversations with older drivers, download or order your free copy of We Need to Talk: Family Conversations with Older Drivers
For a Lifetime Blog
Visit Beth Tracton-Bishop's blog and join the discussion about what we can all do to stay safe on the road and at home.
We Need To Talk
Produced by AARP based on information created jointly by The Hartford and the MIT AgeLab


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